32 Weeks: A Different Kind of Pregnancy Update


I'm 32 weeks pregnant which means in 8 short weeks (let's be honest...maybe 9) I'll have a another newborn in my house, and she will need her mother constantly. It was only 13 months ago that I brought Rooster home, so I remember all too well the overwhelming tiredness and constant 2 hour feedings. I know that the freedom I enjoy now (limited though it is) is coming to an end...soon.

It makes me want to run. I desperately desire my husband to come home one day with flowers and say "Arise, my love, my beautiful one, and come away!" I want to hole myself up in a cabin somewhere with nothing to do but relax and enjoy the fact that I am just not needed. 

It's been forever since I truly felt free. For the past 13 months I have been at the beck and call of one very cute (and demanding) little boy. Of course, I often get a break. Thanks to my wonderful husband and loving church family, I frequently have some time to myself during the day. I usually use the time to clean, work, or prepare meals, those things which are often much easier to do without little hands to help.

And in 2 months there will be another baby to care for. Another mouth to feed. Another 13 months of of constantly being needed. 

Sometimes I wonder if I can do it. 

I have no doubt that God has given us this new child, this little blessing.

Reuben was only 5 months old when we begun praying for another child. I know it sounds crazy, but I was ready. When we would pray as a family I would always ask that the Lord would give us another child in His time, but in my heart, I would always add the "soon" part. I loved having Rooster, but in my heart I knew there was another child waiting for us. 

I thought I was expecting for a couple weeks before we ever got a positive pregnancy test. I was emotional and just felt...well, pregnant, but the test kept coming up negative (I went through several boxes of pregnancy tests). I knew it was unlikely for us to be expecting again so soon, so I did my best to just move on.

Then one evening when I was praying, I felt a still small voice. It was a sudden assurance, a confidence that I was expecting another child. I just knew. I remember the feeling of blessing. God heard me and answered my prayer. 

*At this point I should go ahead and tell you I'm not crazy. This kind of thing has never really happened to me until now.  And yes, I did have to go the store to buy another test, just one! I had to have something to show my husband. 

I remember feeling so excited, so happy. Now, I just feel tired. 

Tired of backaches and sore feet. Tired of temper tantrums and whining. Tired of constantly washing diapers. Tired of the same old routine, day in and day out. Tired of balancing the budget and planning meals and laundry. Just tired.

But that's okay. Because even when I am exhausted and overwhelmed, I still have plenty of Joy. 

Joy in watching my husband chase Rooster around the house.
Joy in singing while I make apple butter and fold laundry.
Joy in reading to a restless little one.
Joy in being kicked in the ribs by a growing baby.
Joy in welcoming my husband home from work with open arms.

Joy in the Lord, for His provision and His many blessings. Joy in answered prayer. 

And I've learned in my 13 month tenure as a mother that it's okay for Joy to be tired. It's okay for her to feel overwhelmed, scarred, and out of place. Joy doesn't have to be perfect.

She just has to be thankful. Thankful that God's strength is made perfect in her weakness and that even in the most exhausting season of life there is always time for a nap (Right...?!?!).

One very tired and very happy momma!


  1. Hey- thanks for keeping it real :) and saying what all moms think at some point. And how true that mamas have joy! A little person who's totally in love with us- how could we not have joy? Blessings on your adventure as a bigger family!

  2. You may be exhausted but you're so beautiful and simply glowing. I know it's prob. hard to see that but it's there. I can see it. :) The end of pregnancies are tough, esp. when you're busy with a toddler or other children. I am a homeschooling mom to 5 daughters and another on the way. When you feel weary, know that this chapter of your life is soon coming to a close and will all be worth it and yes you can most certainly do it now and once that little angel is here.

    Philippians 4:13 I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me.

    Claim that verse mama... memorize it... believe it. It's true! *hugs*




  3. I remember feeling like this when I was expecting #2. My first little boy was an EXHAUSTING child and I had little help with him. I wanted a new baby but was scared to think how I would cope! I started dreading having another after a few weeks of being excited about a pregnancy test. ( and I knew I was pregnant with her before I got a positive, too!) She ended up being a sweet, gentle and was a balm and source of sunshine to my overwhelmed soul! My son was very good with her (for a while anyway ;) )and grew up a lot after she was born. Hang in there and keep cheerful!

    1. Thanks for the encouragement. I have hope that this little one will be all sugar and spice :) We've even decided that her middle name will be Joy, just as a reminder that regardless of her temperament she is a sweet source of happiness.

  4. We all have felt like this ...thanks for your honesty and willingness to put your self out there...your new follower from Better Moms...Nicole...(following by GFC)

    1. Thanks Nicole! I'm glad you're following. Can't wait to get to know you better :)

  5. I had my second child 19 months after my first. I even tandem nursed for awhile so I was tired and overwhelmed by having two. BUT at the same time, it was easier. I already knew what to do. I already knew that babies grow quickly. I already knew that the marathon feedings spread themselves out. Now I have 5(!) kids and each one got easier! Also, right now you are tired and run down from pregnancy, but even if you are tired after birth, you should feel better and more able to handle this awesome job of motherhood. :-)

  6. Hi! I found you through My Joy-Filled Life link up! I recently just found out I'm pregnant with my second one, my first only being 7 months old when we found out. It wasn't planned so I was terrified. Connecting with other moms with little ones super close has helped a lot. I'm excited for you and excited to watch your family grow! You got this, Momma! :D

    1. Congratulations on the new baby! I know that feeling of terror and complete joy all mingled together :) Thanks for the encouragement!

  7. Love this!! Your pic is beautiful. Congratulations on the sweet baby!

  8. Katherine - I just love your updates!

    I really love and appreciate your honesty in this post, and your love and faith in the Lord.

    I've been feeling a lot like this lately! I just told my husband last night that we have been changing diapers for over 10 years!! Ugh!

    But, I love how you say that joy CAN be tired! And yes, God's strength is made perfect in our weaknesses!!


  9. You look wonderful!! You will be able to do it!! God is good and He will give you the strength day by day.

    Thanks so much for linking up over at WholeHearted Home this week. This will be such an encouragement to ladies.



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